I found the article that a nurse of about 10 years (but less than 1 year in our hospital system) showed me on her phone this morning as she approached me for help when I was charting on her floor. The letter the article is about was written by a young nurse and was found by her parents on her laptop after her death by suicide. The letter was published by a local newspaper and is titled, “A letter to my abuser.” She names her abuser- it is the healthcare system. 

I found the letter. You can read her words for yourself and also read the commentary and dialogue by nurses on social media about how they could relate to many of her concerns and pressures they face as they do their work. I wanted to share this with you because it was shared with me this morning by a nurse who was bold enough to confront someone for help- spiritual help. “You’re the pastor, right? The Chaplain?”

Hours later from the close of my shift, I am at home, thinking about this nurse. And I am thinking about the nurse whose letter she showed me.  I saw the young face of the woman in the article on her phone. I remember the face of the young woman and nurse who stood before me sharing openly about her life. 

I don’t take this encounter lightly. I feel that my experiences at work as a Hospital Chaplain are filled with divine connections with others from whom God sends my way or to whom I am sent by God their way. Nothing is by chance or happenstance.  I wanted to bring this to your attention as fellow healthcare workers and persons in ministry. I wanted you to be aware of some of the struggles of those working alongside of us.  I wanted you to see and be affected by the others around you. And if their story is your story, may you also be bold enough and persistent enough to seek help, again and again, until you find what you need in this season. 

https://nurse.org/articles/nurse-died-by-suicide-letter-to-abuser/

I’ve found more commentary from nurses online. For example, here is one who comments on the letter and offers encouragement to other nurses by @aprnbeauty here. If you read through the comments, it may shed light on some of the issues that nursing staff and others face. May we be mindful of their struggles. I recognize that these concerns are also common in other fields as well.

How did I respond?

For those who are curious, yes, absolutely I alerted my leadership about this particular nurse and had conversation with my peer who has already attempted to follow-up with her at the time of this writing. While talking directly with this particular nurse, I did encourage her to seek professional help again as she stated she had used services through our system in the past.

"Yes, you did it before and it is certainly appropriate to seek out those same services again." 

I pointed out to her that I saw her reaching out to others for help, including to the peers that passed her/us by as we talked in the hallway. I pointed out to her that I recognized her efforts, much like the nurse in the letter, to help herself overcome the various obstacles she faced. These obstacles were not all medical or professionally related- but just ‘life‘ related – but all happening at the same time which compounds the severity. It sounds cliche, but in my mind, I was reminded of the beginning of Job found here where all at once he was faced with loss after loss after loss.

I listened to this nurse. I believed that her concerns and issues were legitimate and valid. And yes, of course, I prayed with her and continue to do pray for her even now that I am at home. I’m compelled to share their story and now my story with you.

How will you respond?

Please pray with me for continued direction from the Holy Spirit. How do we best care for ourselves and our mental health as we also care for those in need? Help us God to remember to keep coming to you (and to others) as we were never meant to carry these burdens alone.

Amen.

Blessings and peace to you,

Sejana

Sejana Yoo, M.S.

Hospital Chaplain PRN